


A Hand To Hold

by AussieWriter1



Category: The Blacklist (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-20
Updated: 2013-11-01
Packaged: 2017-12-29 22:53:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 12,716
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1011067
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AussieWriter1/pseuds/AussieWriter1
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Elizabeth Keen's husband is a criminal, yet the only man she can trust is the most dangerous mastermind of all criminals. Originally a one-shot, however it has expanded.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! This little chapter can be taken romantically or platonically, however you swing when it comes to these two. This chapter is based off this picture: http://insidetv.ew.com/2013/10/18/the-blacklist-ray-and-elizabeth-photo/. Hope you enjoy!
> 
> Disclaimer: I am not affiliated with 'The Blacklist' or NBC in any way, nor do I own any of the characters in this story.

“I’m sorry about your husband, Lizzie.”

“Don’t be. If I had just listened to you from the beginning-“

“To be quite honest, I would have questioned your sanity if you had trusted me back then.”

Liz sighed. She was currently seated beside Red in one of D.C’s many parks. She had come here seeking refuge from the chaos that had become her life. One minute she was looking over adoption papers with Tom, the next she was handing him over to the FBI.

Two days ago, Liz had finally gathered the courage to ask Tom about the box that she had found hidden in the floorboards. Naturally, he had denied everything, which only left Liz with one option. She had faced Cooper in his office and confessed to it all – the box, the passports, the gun, the money, her doubts about Tom – everything. Cooper immediately sent teams of agents out to arrest Tom.

When they had brought him to the Post Office, they were able to confirm what Liz had prayed every night to be false. Her husband was a murderer and a criminal. Tom had tried to explain that originally he had wanted to get close to Liz because of her job, but over time had fallen in love with her. As much as Liz had wanted to believe him, she refused to. She couldn’t take the chance that she was wrong about him.

And so Tom was currently in Federal prison, awaiting trial that would only confirm his multiple life sentences. Liz had cried; in fact she had spent ninety-percent of yesterday crying in her room, smashing photo frames and deleting pictures from her phone. But today, Liz found that she couldn’t cry anymore. The tears simply refused to come, and in their absence Liz just felt hollow.

So she had come here, embracing the loneliness and solitude. That is, until Red found her. If she was perfectly honest, Liz wasn’t totally surprised. He knew everything about her after all. The strangest thing was, Liz didn’t mind that he was there. In fact, she was glad. Red didn’t lie to her and he never purposely put her in harms way. She trusted him, no matter how much her instincts told her not too. She knew that she could lean on him, and he would never judge her, for which she was immensely grateful. 

When Red had first found her, they had simply sat in silence, a state that they fell into again after their brief exchange. But it was a comfortable silence; both parties lost in their own thoughts. Liz was surprised at that – she had expected some sort of ‘I told you so’. However, Red seemed quite serious. He obviously somewhat knew what she was dealing with.

After a few more minutes, Red broke the silence again.

“If you need any help with moving Tom’s things out of your home, I would be happy to offer my services.”

Liz was surprised at Red’s offer, but grateful nonetheless.

“Thanks, but I think I’ll manage on my own.” The thought of Red in her home scared her, even though he already knew everything about her. Liz knew that she would probably break down multiple times during the process, and as much as she knew that Red wouldn’t judge her, she still didn’t like the idea of him seeing her cry.

“Very well.”

Liz had expected Red to argue the point, but he surprised her once again by backing down. She knew from the moment that she met the criminal that he was comprised of dozens of mysteries all woven together like a carefully constructed hand-made quilt. She thought that she could solve him, unwind his secrets like the profiler that she is. But she couldn’t. For every secret she uncovered, a dozen more will appear in its place. She supposed that that was a good thing; she would never get ahead of herself, and she would never run out of secrets to find.

As the minutes crept by, Liz found her thoughts slipping from the man next to her back to her husb-Tom. She mentally shook herself. The divorce papers would be in by the end of the month. She couldn’t tie herself to a man she couldn’t trust or love anymore. Soon, Tom would be a distant memory – she would make sure of that.

Liz was suddenly jerked out of her thoughts by something touching her left hand. Looking down, Liz realized that Red hand taken her left hand in his right. Liz relaxed slightly – her consuming thoughts had made her forget that she had company.

Liz moved her gaze from their hands to the children playing to her right. But she wasn’t really seeing them. Since when had she become so comfortable with Red? She was sure that a week ago if he had tried to take her hand she wouldn’t have hesitated to stab him with another pen. So why wasn’t she doing that now? Liz’s attention quickly turned back to her and Red’s connected hands when she felt pressure around her ring finger.

Liz furrowed her brow as she watched Red’s left hand slowly begin to remove her wedding ring whilst his right hand still held onto hers. Liz’s eyes slowly moved to Red’s face. Red’s features were twisted into those of a carpenter putting the final touches on his masterpiece. His eyes held a fire that she’d never seen in them before. The concentration on his face caused Liz’s mind to instantly become a battlefield of confusion.

Gently, Red finally removed Liz’s ring. He tenderly opened her palm and placed the ring into it. Liz was finally able to move her hand and close her fist over the vile piece of metal. Red, obviously feeling the tension rising in Liz, took her hand in his again and used his thumb to brush soothing circles over the back her hand.

Liz closed her eyes as she felt the anger and tension that had settled in her bones dissipate. There would be no point in getting angry; what’s done is done.

As Liz breathed slowly, her eyes still closed, she felt Red’s lips on her hair. She knew that she should get up and walk away. She knew that she shouldn’t be sitting here with this man, this criminal, especially in this position. But for some strange, insane reason that Liz couldn’t put her finger on, she felt safe here. As if all the forces of hell couldn’t touch her in this moment.

Slowly, Liz lowered her head to rest on Red’s shoulder. She felt Red place his head slightly on top of hers. Unknowingly, he had calmed and comforted her in ways that she knew no one else could. 

“Actually, I think I will take you up on that offer.” Thinking about it, Liz realized that cleaning out Tom’s possessions wouldn’t be that hard if she had someone there to lean on. Someone to help her carry on. Someone to make sarcastic remarks about a certain outfit that she or Tom had decided to wear on a particular day. Someone to hold to demons at bay.

Red chuckled in that way that he seemed to only reserve for her as he squeezed her hand.

In that moment, Liz had never felt more at peace with the world. She knew now what she needed – a hand to hold. And the owner of that hand, as much as it shocked her to admit it, was Red Reddington.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There you go, hope you liked it! Thinking about maybe writing another, with Agent Ressler seeing this unfold and then questioning Liz about it later. But I don't know, please don't hold me to that. Anyway, hope you're having a great day, and please don't hesitate to leave some constructive criticism! I'm afraid I might have made the characters a little OOC, apologies if that's that case. :)


	2. Memories and Tears

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red follows through on his offer to help Liz with Tom's possessions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I've decided to forgo the chapter where Ressler sees Liz/Red's interactions from the first chapter and then confronts Liz about it. I might write it later, but I don't know. This idea came and it wasn't going away. Thanks to 'Katherine' who commented on chapter one suggesting this chapter. Hope you like it!  
> DISCLAIMER: I don't own 'The Blacklist' nor any character that is present or mentioned in this chapter.

“Really, what were you thinking when you wore that?!”

Liz laughed as she gazed down to the picture in Red’s hand. They were currently standing side-by-side in Liz’s house. Red, who had followed through on his offer of helping her clean out Tom’s possessions, had taken it upon himself to comment on nearly everything he could see. Liz had noticed that he seemed to speak up whenever she held something too long, something that could potentially spark a break down. For that, she was grateful.

The picture that was currently under Red’s microscope of scrutiny was one from about two years ago. Captured within it were Liz and Tom, their faces laughing over a joke long forgotten. The item of clothing in question, however, was a bright pink sweater that Liz had been sporting.

“We had a bet. God, I can’t even remember what it was. But whoever lost had to wear something that the winner picked out. He picked that.” Liz explained thoughtfully.

“Well he had a marvelous dress sense.” Red replied sarcastically as he leant over to place the photo in a box at their feet. Said box was slowly being filled up with past memories, ones that Liz wanted desperately to forget.

Liz laughed again. “What about you? I’m sure you haven’t always worn things like this.” Liz gestured at Red’s white, three-piece suit.

“I once spent three weeks in a cave in Somalia, wearing nothing but a few rags. But I can assure you, Lizzie, even those were more stylish than that.”

Liz found herself laughing again. God, it had been too long since she had laughed. In fact, she couldn’t even remember a time when she had laughed before this morning. But really, how was she not supposed to laugh when Red had arrived looking as though he was coming for a meeting with the President? The man sure loved to dress fancy.

The next few minutes passed in comfortable silence. Occasionally, Red would hold out a picture for Liz to contemplate. Every time, Liz hesitated for exactly zero seconds before nodding, signaling for Red to place it in the box. She knew that she should probably keep something, but the pain was too much. She had loved him, and now he was gone. She wasn’t sure if she ever wanted to trust anyone, specifically any man, again.

More than once throughout the day, Red had tried to convince Liz to take a break. He suggested going down to a local restaurant, just for a little while. However, Liz knew that if she stopped, she would never get going again. All she wanted was for this to be done, so that she could stop thinking about it; about him.

As Liz leaned over to grab a photo frame from one of the small cabinets that were seating in her living room, the one placed behind it grabbed her attention. 

Liz felt her breath catch in her throat. Her eyelids blinked rapidly, trying to keep in the tears that hadn’t yet surfaced. She quickly excused herself from Red, muttering something about getting something from her bedroom upstairs. She could feel Red’s eyes burning into her back as she fled from the room.

Liz took the stairs two at a time, racing to make it to her bedroom before the tears began to fall. When she finally made it to the room, she quickly closed the door before collapsing on the side of her bed. Slowly, she inched herself down so she was sitting on the floor with her back sinking into the soft side of the mattress.

It was only then that she felt the tears fall. She wanted to hit herself; she had promised herself that she wouldn’t cry. Not today, not tomorrow. Yet here she was, a shaking wreak with tears cascading down her cheeks. She cursed herself for not being strong enough, for being weak.

 

Red stayed standing exactly where Liz had left him, staring at the stairs after her. He frowned, hating the fact that she didn’t want him to see her cry. He wanted to be there for her, the one that she leaned on. He wanted to be the lucky owner of the shoulder that she cried on. But she didn’t want him to be, and that’s what hurt him the most.

He had noticed her refusal to even mention Tom by name within the first few minutes of his arrival in her home. Naturally, he had followed her lead. He didn’t feel the need to bring it up. After all, the reason he was here was to provide comfort, not dig up nasty, unwanted memories. The pictures did a good enough job of that on their own.

Fighting the incredibly strong urge to follow Lizzie, Red managed to tear his eyes away from the stairs and look around. Just as he was about to move towards a photo that lay on the other side of the room, a certain glint caught his eye. 

Red immediately froze. He knew that glint – God knows he had had a few installed in his time. That was the glint of a camera lens. Rage filled him. Someone had been spying on his Lizzie. Someone who was going to pay.

Slowly glancing around again, Red counted several other possible hiding places for small surveillance cameras. After waiting a few moments, Red strode across the room to the first one he had spotted. This particular camera was situated behind Lizzie’s bookshelf. Using all of his strength, Red tore the camera out from it’s hiding spot, effectively rendering it useless. Slipping it into his pocket, Red spent the next few minutes delivering the same fate to all the other cameras hidden within the room.

After he had disposed of the rest, Red moved onto the next room. And the next one after that. Once he was absolutely sure that no hidden cameras remained on the bottom floor of Lizzie’s home, Red made his way to the stairs. Before climbing them, Red found himself taking a deep breath. Wait, was he nervous? The Red Reddington, the one who singlehandedly held the FBI, and most of the criminal world, in his grasp?

Red shook his head, and began the climb.

 

Liz, who had heard Red moving throughout her house, still hadn’t been able to gather the courage nor the strength to move. It wasn’t as if she had anything to hide. In fact, she found that she didn’t care that Red was probably going through all her things. After all, it wasn’t as though she had anything that she could keep from him. He knew everything about her; there was nothing more for him to know.

Liz’s tears had somewhat dried, although she suspected that that was because her body’s inability to create any more. She leant back, embracing the softness that was her mattress. Placing her head in her hands, Liz felt her eyes flutter shut.

When the door slowly creaked open a few moments later, Liz opened her eyes. However, she didn’t move her hands. She felt rather than saw Red move into the room. As he carefully seated himself on her left, Liz felt a rush of déjà vu.

Just like before, at the park, the pair sat in comfortable silence – both with their knees drawn up, although Liz’s were marginally closer to her body. Liz, relaxing slightly, let her eyes shut once again.

Minutes, or perhaps hours later, Liz felt Red placing his hand upon her back. Slowly, he rubbed soothing circles, all the while remaining silent. Liz felt her wall break, and she slowly shifted her body towards Red. 

Red, clearly sensing what Liz was doing, maneuvered his arms so that they were surrounding her. Once again, he placed his head on top of hers.

“If you don’t mind me asking Lizzie, what was the picture of?” Red had obviously noticed the photo that had sent Liz into a breakdown.

“It-it was of our wedding. That was my happiest moment.” Liz took a shaky breath. “What am I supposed to do? My happiest moment is now my most hated one.”

“Well that’s the good part, I guess. You get to pick a new one.”

For all she was worth, Liz couldn’t decipher the feelings that rose in her chest. The only thing she knew for sure was that here, surrounded by the comforting warmth of one of the most dangerous criminals, she felt safe. As Liz moved her hands away from her face and curled them next to Red’s chest, she heard him sigh in what she could only describe as content. 

And as Liz felt her body and mind succumbing to the deep abyss that was sleep, she, more to her surprise than anyone else’s, could honestly say that the feeling was mutual.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, yeah. Can anyone see the little Tangled reference right near the end? Seriously, it's one of my favourite movies and I just couldn't help but throw it in there. Hoped you liked it!


	3. Accusations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red takes care of the 'camera situation', yet the consequences are more severe than he could have ever imagined.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter! First, thank you to all of the lovely Blacklisters who have left comments on this story. You're all amazing and make me smile constantly! Thank you! Second, thank you again to 'Katherine' who inspired this chapter. This is dedicated to you! Apologies for the shortness, yet big things are coming ;)
> 
> DISCLAIMER: As always, I am not affiliated with 'The Blacklist' in any way. The character in this chapter are not mine (no matter how much I wish they were).

“Get out! Get the hell out of my house!”

“Lizzie, I can exp-“

“No! Get out and stay the hell away from me!”

Red stumbled back as Lizzie slammed her front door as hard as a boxer hits their opponent. Staring at the door with a pained expression on his face, Red thought back to the past few days.

After Lizzie had fallen asleep against him, he had carefully picked her up and placed her onto her bed. Red had waited a few minutes, before disposing of the cameras that someone had placed seemingly everywhere on the upper floor of Lizzie’s home. As he removed a small lens that had been placed overlooking Lizzie’s bed, Red felt himself being filled with the rage of a thousand suns. 

Just before he had left, Red had placed a soft kiss upon Lizzie’s forehead, to which Lizzie had replied to with a contented sigh. 

Red had then immediately gone about arranging a meeting with one of his many contacts. This particular man was known to his associates of the criminal world as ‘The Techie’. It was rumored that he could access any secure feed and extract the most delicate pieces of information from them – for a price. Since Red currently had the FBI compensating for him (whether they liked it or not), there was no hesitation in handing over the funds. 

During their brief meeting, Red handed over the first bug that he had removed from Lizzie’s home. It took ‘The Techie’ approximately ten minutes to track down the location of the signal feed. Red felt anger bubbling in the pit of his stomach when he realized that the location was extremely close to Lizzie’s home.

When Lizzie had left the house for lunch with a friend, Red took his chance. He confronted the foul creatures that had taken to spying on Lizzie and had readily terminated them. Unfortunately for him, that had been when everything that he had worked so hard to achieve came crashing down on him.

Somehow, the FBI had tracked his movements and had come to the extremely wrong conclusion that he was responsible for the cameras. Obviously, they didn’t have any solid evidence, but their suspicious were strong enough for Lizzie to cut him off completely. She hadn’t answered any of his calls, and had refused to see him when he had requested her presence through the FBI.

Frustrated, Red had given up on a sideways approach, and had come straight to Lizzie to explain himself. Alas, when Lizzie had seen him, she had become angry. No matter what Red had said to try and clear his name, Lizzie was having none of it.

The one person that he trusted, the one person whom he had ever opened up to, however slightly, now didn’t want to have anything to do with him. Lizzie hated him, and now, as much as he couldn’t admit it, Red felt a large crack running down his rusty, old heart.  
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

After slamming the door, Liz found herself collapsing against it. As she slid herself down to a seated position, Liz discovered that she didn’t even feel angry anymore. No, the only emotion currently encasing her heart was despair. The man that she knew she shouldn’t have trusted was the only man she felt as if she could trust. But now, as she felt the inevitable heartbreak, Liz mentally kicked herself for being so stupid. Red was a criminal, a murderer and a liar. She should never have allowed him to get so close to her heart.

But she had, and now she was feeling to painful consequences. 

Taking a deep breath, Liz gathered her strength and slowly rose to gaze through the peephole of her door. He was still standing there, the man who had betrayed her. If she didn’t feel so hurt, Liz would have laughed. This was the second man that had betrayed her, and he was also trying to explain himself. He didn’t understand, just as Tom hadn’t. There was nothing to explain, and no reason to indulge in such attempts.

It was clear to her now. All that crap about “knowing her father” was false - Red had received all of his information about her and Tom through surveillance feeds that he had implanted in her home. He was nothing more than a lying old man trying to gain the trust of someone that he could manipulate to serve his own purposes. 

As she watched him, Red gently placed his hand on the door that divided them. Liz flinched – it was as if he knew that she was still there. She felt her eyes widen as Red muttered a few words, seemingly to himself.

“I’m sorry Lizzie. One day, you’ll know the truth. One day, you’ll allow yourself to.”

With that, the criminal mastermind turned his back and descended the stairs leading to her home. And as Liz watched him go, she couldn’t place the feeling rising within her. However, despite all her sub conscience’s efforts to displace the feeling further, it somehow managed to fight it’s way to the forefront of her mind.

Liz gasped as she realized that the feeling was an unholy mix of pity and sadness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OOOHHH. *coughs* yeah. Anyway, hope you liked it! Again, apologies for this slightly shorter chapter, yet as I mentioned, big things are coming. Thanks to anyone that's read this story, I appreciate every single one of you! See you next time :)


	4. What Happened To Red?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The FBI brings Liz in, only to tell her that Red's gone missing. Liz needs to put the pieces of the puzzle together, and she needs to do it fast.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woah, long chapter! I'm trying to pump out one chapter per day, because my end of year exams just finished and I want to take advantage of the small period of time in which our teachers are barely give us homework. There's only a few chapter left (I think), so I'm trying to write it as quick as possible.  
> Also, I really like the idea of Meera Malik being a sort-of older sister to Liz. So in this story, she is.  
> Finally, thanks to everyone who has commented, left kudos, and bookmarked this story. I can't even begin to tell you how much that means to me.  
> Anyway, I'll shut up now.
> 
> DISCLAIMER: No, I don't own 'The Blacklist'. Yada yada. No, I don't own any of the characters present or mentioned in this chapter. Yada yada. Now on with the story!

The next few days saw Liz simply staying at home, spending her mornings in bed and her afternoons sitting at her dinner table. She was simply existing. She knew that she was being irresponsible and childish, ignoring all calls and texts from her coworkers, yet she couldn’t find herself to care. If she went into work, she would be forced to spend time with Red, since he only cared to speak with her.

Liz’s tactics were frustrating the FBI, just as she knew they would. Fortunately, they didn’t swarm her home with helicopters and black vans and bring her in kicking and screaming. Liz could tell that the FBI’s patience was wearing thin, a suspicion that was proven when she heard the knocking on her door.

Cautiously, Liz approached her front door and peered through the peephole. She felt her shoulders relax as she realized who it was. Or, more importantly, who it wasn’t.

“Meera.” Liz opened the door, revealing her friend.

“We need you to come in.”

Liz frowned slightly at Meera’s all business tone. Her manner had not left room for discussion, which implied that something big was going down. However, that didn’t stop Liz.

“Look, I really can’t-“

“Reddington’s not there.”

Liz relaxed further. Of course her friend would see straight through her charade and uncover the truth. Meera nodded, and turned around, heading for her car. Liz quickly rushed back into her home and grabbed her bag, before heading out and following Meera.  
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

“It’s good to see you again Agent Keen.”

“About time you showed up.”

Cooper and Ressler’s respective comments made Liz smile and roll her eyes in equal proportion. As much as Cooper probably didn’t trust her when she first began work under him, the recent revelations regarding Tom had softened his feelings towards her. And as for Ressler, well, he was simply being Ressler. 

“I’m not so sure if it’s good to be back. So, what’s the problem? Where’s Reddington?” Liz replied, ignoring Ressler and addressing Cooper.

“We were hoping you could tell us that.”

Liz felt her brow furrow in confusion. They didn’t know where he was? 

“What? What the hell happened to his tracking chip?”

“It's offline. Seems to us that Reddington simply packed up his things and left.” Ressler answered, adopting his trademark pose of placing his hands on his hips.

“Are you sure he isn’t just ‘keeping up appearances’?”

“That’s what we thought initially,” Meera spoke up, “but it seems as though Reddington’s simply dropped off the grid. He hasn’t contacted us in a couple of days, and his people have completely ignored our attempts at getting in contact.”

Liz was shocked. The Red she knew wouldn’t have just gotten up and left. He had an agenda, a purpose for being here. Albeit, she didn’t know exactly what it was, but she was positive that it was extremely important. Liz felt confusion clouding her mind. Something was off about this whole situation.

“We need to know, has Reddington been in contact with you since the… ‘camera situation’?” Cooper asked cautiously.

Liz was so caught up in her thoughts that her brain barely registered the question. When it finally clicked, Liz hesitated. She wanted to tell him about Red’s stunt of appearing at her home, but she didn’t. She just couldn’t tell how Cooper would react, and that thought terrified her. She was supposed to be a profiler, but in the last few weeks, her skills had slipped. It seemed as though she had become in adept at reading the people that were close to her.

After a few more moments of deliberation within the confines of her mind, Liz decided against revealing Red’s showing up at her home. She felt slightly guilty – she had never lied directly to his face before – she respected him too much. However, she found the lie slipping surprisingly easily from her tongue. Liz mentally shook herself; she had been spending way too much time around Red.

“No. I haven’t heard from him for a few days either.”

Liz could feel the disappointment radiating from the three agents around her. They had obviously been certain that Liz could shed some light on the situation. Frustrated, Ressler spoke up.

“Reddington’s gone. He played us right from the beginning. Obviously something better’s come up, so now he’s gone back to doing what he does best.”

“I don’t think that’s true.”

All the eyes quickly fell on Liz. Standing up a little straighter, Liz continued.

“Reddington wouldn’t just leave. He’s made it crystal clear that he wants to catch all of the names on the Blacklist. He wouldn’t walk away from that.”

“That’s just profiling nonsense.” Ressler scoffed.

“No, it’s not.” Liz snapped. “It’s fact.” Liz glared directly at the blonde haired agent as she spoke. She briefly recalled their conversion they had shared whilst dealing with the Courier. During that small exchange, Ressler had made it abundantly clear that he dealt with facts, not mental tricks. From the shift in his gaze, Liz knew that he was remembering the same moment.

Cooper fixed Liz with a penetrating stare, and Liz transferred her gaze to him. “Are you suggesting foul play?”

“I’m not suggesting anything. I’m simply stating that the entire time Reddington was here, he was in control. He was exactly where he wanted to be, in the center of classified information with us wrapped around his finger. I mean, what could be better for a high profile criminal than being directly situated in the database of high intelligence? Why would he walk away from that?”

Silence met Liz’s statement. After a few seconds, Meera spoke.

“Reddington is one of the most notorious criminals there is. He’s made plenty of enemies during his life. Maybe one believed that it was time to eliminate him from the equation.”

Liz nodded, silently thanking Meera for backing her up. Her friend nodded back, silently yet quite obviously saying ‘You’re welcome.’

As Cooper and Ressler quickly engaged in a conversation about Red’s known enemies, Liz felt the need to extract herself from the room. She had made her point, now she needed some space to breathe.

Liz’s felt immediately directed her in the location of her office. Stepping inside, Liz felt peace that was similar to stepping in front of a fan on a hot day. Quickly crossing to her desk, Liz collapsed in her chair. Despite herself and her current feelings of animosity towards the criminal, Liz couldn’t help but feel slightly worried for Red. She knew that he could take of himself; in fact she had witnessed it firsthand on multiple occasions. The man wasn’t weak, and he wasn’t stupid.

Still, Liz felt a slight pang of worry in her chest. If something bad had happened, if Red had somehow gotten himself kidnapped, she wasn’t sure what she would do.

Needing a distraction, Liz glanced down at her desk. Sitting on top was a cream folder, the contents a mystery. Curious, Liz reached down and opened the unfamiliar file. Inside was information complied on the recent case against Red. Liz immediately knew that Red himself had sent her the file; he would want her to review the FBI’s theories for herself, so that she could put the pieces together and see that he was telling the truth.

Disregarding her better judgment, Liz flipped through the few pages that the file contained. Just as she was about to toss the folder away, a small, handwritten note at the bottom of the last page grabbed her attention. Whipping the page out and placing it on top of the very small pile, Liz read through the short note before dropping everything. Just before she tore out of the room, Liz opened her desk draw and withdrew her gun and holster. After that, she was gone.  
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

After reading the note, Liz had raced through the Post Office and arrived at her car. Quickly starting up the engine, Liz took off.

Following what was an approximately ten minute excruciating and frustrating drive through traffic, Liz finally arrived at what appeared to be an abandoned warehouse. Slipping from her car that she had smartly parked on the opposite side of the road, Liz carefully crossed the street and cautiously approached the building.

Not wanting to burst through the front door for obvious reasons, Liz quickly located a small window to the side of the warehouse, which she was able to slip though and enter the amazingly old yet still standing building. A rush of cold air as well as the smell of rotting fish greeted Liz as she quietly landed. Doing her best not to gag, Liz pulled her gun from its holster. Thanking her lucky stars that she had remembered to bring it, Liz slowly began walking through the building.

She had landed in a small corridor, which had several doors connected to it that evidently led to various parts of the building. Ignoring the door that was omitting the disgusting odor of rotting fish, Liz made her way through the corridor, grasping her gun with both hands and pointing the tip down. 

After trying and failing to open several locked doors, Liz finally pressed against a door that wasn’t bolted shut. Taking a deep breath, Liz used her shoulder to slowly open the age-old door.

Pulling her gun up, Liz burst through the door. After the deep darkness of the corridor, Liz’s eyes took a moment to adjust to the semi-brightness of the room. Glancing around, Liz quickly registered that there was a single chair situated in the middle of the room, with two low hanging lights hovering above it.

Liz felt her breath catch in her throat as she her brain finally recorded the slouched and immobilized man seated in the wooden and clearly very uncomfortable chair. As he raised his eyes to meet hers, Liz felt a wave of dizziness overcoming her as she stared at an extremely bloodied and bruised Raymond Reddington.

Feeling her grip on her weapon slip slightly, Liz stumbled towards him. All of a sudden, a figure materialized out of the darkness. The last thing Liz saw as she felt the butt of a gun being rammed into her left temple was Red’s eyes contorted into a silent scream. 

The blackness consumed her before she even hit the floor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CLIFFHANGER :O Aha, sorry. This chapter and the next were originally supposed to be a small story on their own, but then I got carried away with extending this story and I realised that both ideas fit together so well and I just couldn't resist! Hope you liked it, and I'll try and get the next chapter out as soon as possible.  
> Again, thanks for reading. You guys inspire me to keep writing.


	5. A Criminal's Confession

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Liz wakes and the man behind everything is revealed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Longest chapter yet! Apologies for that, but I just couldn't seem to stop writing. Thank you so much to everyone who is reading this, you keep me smiling! Hope you enjoy this next chapter :)
> 
> DISCLAIMER: Same as always. I'm not affiliated with 'The Blacklist' and the only character that I own is the man introduced in this chapter.

“Listen, I just wanted to say that-“

Agent Ressler cut himself off when he finally noticed that Keen wasn’t present in her office. Shaking his head, Ressler realized that he must’ve been so preoccupied before entering the room that he didn’t register Keen’s absence in the office. Glancing around in confusion, Ressler swore that he had seen Keen entering her office not twenty minutes ago.

Carefully walking further into the small office, Ressler found his mind slowly becoming a battlefield of conflicting thoughts. Where the hell was Keen? After her performance in the Ops room, he knew that she wouldn’t have simply bailed on them. Approaching his fellow agent’s desk, Ressler’s eyes quickly scanned the various items that lay on the top of the extremely cluttered piece of furniture. 

The piece of paper that lay on top of a file immediately caught his attention. Ressler extended his hand and grabbed the sheet, eyes flying over the words. Ressler felt his chest tighten as he noticed the small, handwritten note at the bottom of the page. Scrawled in bright red ink, was a short address.

394 Florence Rd. Washington D.C

Tightening his grip on the paper, Ressler turned and sprinted from the room, pulling out his phone on the way.  
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

The first thing Liz felt as she slowly regained consciousness was a sharp, painful throbbing situated near her left temple. Pain shot out from her temple and obscured her senses. Liz suddenly realized that she her hands were tied when she tried to move them up to her head in order to assess the damage. In trying to move her legs, the only thing that Liz received was the confirmation that she was currently sitting in what felt like a hard, wooden chair, her arms and legs tied down securely.

Finally finding the strength to open her eyes, Liz scrunched her face and squinted, the change in lighting temporarily blinding her. After blinking several times, Liz was able to open her eyes wider. The first image that assaulted her vision was that of Red sitting a few meters in front of her, still tied up and looking extremely worse for wear. Duct tape was covering his mouth, preventing him from speaking. Blood was trickling down his face from a cut next to his right eye, and a mixture of fresh and dried blood was also evident on the rest of his features. His usually spotless clothes were crumpled and blood-soaked. Feeling a horrible sense of déjà vu, the memory of finding Tom in an extremely similar position quickly flashed in Liz’s mind.

Even from this distance Liz was able to discern the worry and fear evident in his eyes. Liz felt the terror rising in her throat. Red was never scared; or never showed it at least. If he was scared, Liz was terrified.

Feeling the pain in her head subsiding somewhat, Liz tore her gaze from Red and glanced around her. From her position, Liz was able to count at least six armed men surrounding them. However, she couldn’t tell just how many more awaited in the darkness.

Liz jumped as a deep, threatening voice suddenly filled the room. It seemed to come at her from all angles, cutting through her like a sharp kitchen knife sliced through an onion.

“Glad to see you’re finally back with us, Agent Keen.”

Liz felt herself beginning to tremble. How did he know her name? What the hell was going on?

“H-how do you know my name?” Liz mentally kicked herself for sounding so afraid. Of course, she was afraid, but that was beside the point.

The owner of the voice laughed. It was a deep, unemotional and humorless noise. It sliced through Liz and gripped her heart with an icy fist. Finally, the owner of the voice stepped forward out of the unforgiving darkness from behind Red. He was a tall, black haired man with a calculating and evil glint in his deep blue eyes. He stood next to Red; hands clasped behind his back, and pierced Liz with a deadly stare.

“Of course,” the man began in his deep, heartless voice, “you don’t know the story, do you?”

Ignoring the man’s rhetorical question, Liz pulled her courage out from where it had been hiding. She addressed the unknown man in a monotone voice, not wishing to express any fear that was currently clouding her mind.

“Who are you?”

“John Harrison.”

“And that’s your real name?”

The man chuckled emotionlessly once again. “Of course not, but I did enjoy that Star Trek film.” Placing his hand on the back of Red’s chair, ‘John Harrison’ continued. “Now, let us get back to the business at hand.”

After glancing down at Red for a brief moment, ‘Harrison’ brought his gaze back to Liz.

“A few days ago, our mutual friend Reddington here took out two of my most trusted people. At first, I was confused. ‘Why?’ I asked myself. After a bit of digging through various sources, I came across you, Agent Keen of the FBI. It all became clear to me then.”

Shifting his gaze, ‘Harrison’ glared down at Red, the fire of hatred and disgust burning within his eyes.

“The Concierge of Crime was now in league with the FBI.” 

Liz felt an involuntary shudder erupt down her back was ‘Harrison’ spat out the words in obvious disgust. Liz could feel the understandable sense of betrayal coming off the man in waves. ‘Harrison’ continued in a deadly growl.

“It became apparent that it was time to remove this troublesome cockroach from the equation. After all, who knew what else he could divulge to you and your federal friends?”

“So why not just kill him and be done with it? Why all of this?” Liz asked in trembling voice. She didn’t want them to kill Red, but the profiler in her was bursting with questions. Her yearning to understand the criminal mind seriously came out at the most inappropriate of times.

“Because that’s not the point,” ‘Harrison’ replied coldly. “No, killing him would be too easy. You see, when someone betrays you, the trick is to hurt them.”

Liz froze, and she could see Red tensing up as well. ‘Harrison’s’ tone made his intentions inescapably clear.

‘Harrison’ straightened, and slowly stalked towards Liz, malice filling every stride. Once he reached her, he bent down and placed his face within inches of Liz’s. Dropping his voice to a whisper, ‘Harrison’ continued.

“After all, what sort of a criminal would I be if I allowed the despicable Raymond Reddington to get the easy way out?”

Liz had never felt more helpless. Her trembling intensified, and rebellious tears sprung to her eyes. ‘Harrison’, obviously pleased with the reaction he had provoked from her, straightened. Lifting his voice again, ‘Harrison’s’ next sentence caused the bottom of Liz’s stomach to disappear.

“Since this matter is between myself and Reddington, I’ve decided to kill … you first.” As he spoke, ‘Harrison’ raised his arm and pointed his outstretched index finger towards Liz.

Across from her, Red began emitting what was most likely to be horrified screams - screams that only got as far as the duct tape that encased his lips. This caused ‘Harrison’ to shift his attention from Liz to Red.

“Is there a problem, Reddington? I did tell you that I wanted you to suffer, did I not?”

“Please,” Liz choked, “don’t do this.” 

Tears began cascading down Liz’s face like an intense waterfall. She knew she probably looked like a total wreak, but she was far from the point of caring. She couldn’t die like this. The helplessness that Liz felt increased; she was going to die here, surrounded by a bunch of mad criminals, and there was nothing she could do about it. 

“But I must, Agent Keen. However, I do believe that it is traditional for a killer to offer his victim a chance to utter last words. So, is there anything you wish to say to the man who has led you to your death?”

With blurred vision from her tears, Liz stared longingly at the criminal that had strutted into her perfectly normal life a few months ago and completely turned it upside-down. There were so many things that she could say, so many words that she longed to say. Each sentence that ran through her head seemed more ridiculous and pointless than the last. Finally, her fear-muddled mind came up with a simple phase. Trying to put emphasis on every emotion that she had ever felt towards the man, Liz stared straight into Red’s eyes and muttered the only thing her brain had deemed acceptable to say.

“I’m sorry.”

Liz desperately searched Red’s eyes for any indication that he had understood the many hidden emotions that lay beneath those two short words. As Red’s eyes softened, Liz felt herself overcome with relief. At least she would die knowing that the man who had protected her unconditionally knew that she no longer felt any animosity towards him.

‘Harrison’, seeming surprised by Liz’s words, slowly turned to face Red. Quickly crossing to stand next to the man he had abducted, ‘Harrison’ reached out and tore the bloodied tape away from Red’s lips. Liz’s heart broke slightly as she noticed that Red didn’t even have the energy to cry out in pain as the tape was ripped off. 

“Well Reddington?” ‘Harrison’ asked. “Anything you wish to tell Agent Keen before the end?”

As Red’s green eyes met Liz’s brown, she could see the conflicting emotions fighting a fierce battle behind his eyes. Liz knew that fear could cause a person to say things that they would never normally say. She briefly wondered if the same would ring true for Red.

Obviously frustrated, ‘Harrison’ yelled.

“Well!?” 

Prompted by the sudden scream, Red finally opened his lips.

“I’m sorry too, Lizzie. For everything.” 

As Liz took in Red’s words, she nodded, indicating that she had understood the emotions and sincerity that Red had packed behind his words. He was apologizing not only for everything that had happened since he had entered her life, but also for not being able to keep his unsaid promise of protecting her from all harm. Clearly not happy with the words Red had chosen, ‘Harrison’ prompted him again.

“Is that all, Reddington? Are you sure that there isn’t anything else you wish to convey to her? Last chance, remember that.”

Liz’s eyes flicked briefly to ‘Harrison’, before landing back on Red. From the way his eyes tightened, it was clear that Red was struggling to find his voice. He had sustained heavy injuries, and had already lost so much blood. It killed Liz to see him this way. At last, Red muttered the words that not Liz, nor anyone else, could have ever predicted. 

“I love you, Lizzie. I should have told you every day from the I moment met you.”

Liz felt her breath catch, her heart exploding with conflicting emotions. He … loved her? But he was Raymond Reddington, the most notorious criminal of the age. The one who had abandoned his family, only to resurface as a lawless and self-serving man a few years later. He couldn’t love her.

However, it was times such as these that Liz couldn’t decide whether her ability to read people was a good thing or not. She could see the sincerity in his eyes, and she could hear it in his voice. That scared her more than anything that had happened since she arrived here. The most skilled liar she knew was finally opening up and not holding anything back.

Confused and scared, Liz couldn’t find her voice to respond. Her eyes dropped Red’s penetrating gaze, and she stared at the ground, new tears spilling from her eyes.

“How touching,” ‘Harrison’s’ voice broke through Liz’s consuming thoughts. “Unfortunately, we’ll never know how she feels.”

As Liz heard the familiar click of a gun’s safety being switched off, she squeezed her eyes shut. She couldn’t bear to look at Red, couldn’t bear to see the fear and hurt that would be evident in his eyes. As Liz sat, waiting for the end, she heard a scream erupt from in front of her, and the loud sound of a gun being fired filled the room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry not sorry. I pictured the main villain in this chapter to look like John Harrison/Khan from the recent 'Star Trek: Into Darkness' film. Except in this he's wearing a suit instead of a Starfleet uniform. Again, sorry not sorry. I wasn't originally gonna end this here, but I don't know, it seemed to work. Also, if I didn't end it there, it would've extended over 10 word document pages. Anyway, hoped you liked it! P.S kudos to anyone who can spot the small 'Pirates of the Caribbean' reference ;)


	6. Actions Speak Louder Than Words

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, new chapter! First, I'm not an action writer. For one, I'm just not good at it. Plus, this story isn't based around the chase and capture of a criminal, it's about the characters and their relationships. Second, thank you to everyone following this story. Without you, this story would still be a one-shot, with the other chapters withering away in my mind. Hope you enjoy this chapter :)
> 
> DISCLAIMER: No, I'm not affiliated with 'The Blacklist' in any way, shape, or form.

The excruciating pain that Liz had expected never came. Instead, there was a loud thud, and the sound of multiple doors being slammed open. Liz wrenched her eyes open to the scene of dozens of agents swarming the room. Leading the charge, Liz recognized Ressler, with hair messed up and what she hoped was someone else’s blood smeared across his cheek. 

The agents had arrived in a very movie-esque fashion – at the absolute last minute. As a battle raged around her, with both parties firing constant shots and taking down opposite agents, Liz realized that the FBI’s sudden appearance had caught ‘Harrison’s’ people completely by surprise. They didn’t have the appropriate time to react and ergo they were extremely unprepared and outmatched.

Liz’s eyes found ‘Harrison’, still standing exactly where she remembered him to be. His body had assumed an angry, fighting stance, yet his eyes betrayed his true emotions. He was scared and defeated.

In a matter of minutes, ‘Harrison’s’ people were either disarmed or dead, with the main man himself being forced on his knees by a familiar blonde agent. Ressler was aggressive and dominant, yet his eyes conveyed his obvious sense of victory and pride. When ‘Harrison’ had finally lowered himself to the ground with his hands on his head, Ressler raised his gaze to stare at Liz. Catching his eye, Liz nodded her thanks. Honestly, right now she felt as though she could kiss him, however she was still restrained, which was probably for the better.

As heavily armed men escorted the remainder of ‘Harrison’ and his men out of the room, Ressler made his way quickly over to Liz. He spoke softly as he began untying his coworker.

“Are you alright?”

“I’m fine. Thank you.”

Ressler, who had determinedly kept his eyes focused on Liz’s restraints, finally looked up at her. Liz could see that he had understood the weight behind Liz’s thanks.

“You’re welcome. I’m sorry we didn’t get here sooner.”

Liz couldn’t find the right words to respond with, so she simply settled for a nod. Ressler seemed to understand, and he quickly looked back down and finished untying her. When the restraints had been successfully removed, Ressler touched Liz’s arm and helped her to stand. Liz quickly brushed him off.

“I’m fine. Red needs immediate medical attention.”

Staring into her eyes, it was clear the Ressler could see straight through Liz’s lie. She was most certainly not fine, but there was nothing to be done. It was over, and Ressler would never find out exactly what had gone down in the darkened room before he and the FBI had arrived.

The blonde agent nodded, and moved towards Red. Liz turned away as she felt Red’s eyes searching for hers. She was still extremely confused, and not overly confident that Red had been telling the truth earlier. Her mind was a tangled web that she simply couldn’t bring herself to unravel just yet. 

Liz’s heart wanted to shut down, to block out any potential feelings that Red may or may not have reserved for her. Despite her heart’s denial, Liz’s head, which had always been her database of logic, constantly impressed on her the idea that Red might not have been lying, that he might not have had a manipulative motive. 

Shaking her weary and bruised head, Liz wiped the remaining tears from her eyes and face, before moving to the doorway in which she had entered the room. Meera and Cooper stood silently, awaiting her arrival into their presence. As much as Liz wanted desperately to go and hide for a few days to collect her thoughts, she knew that it was her duty to inform Cooper of the situation. Pushing all of her thoughts about a certain criminal to the dark recesses of her mind, Liz began her not completely honest recount of events.

At some point during her tired speech, Cooper had obviously sensed that there was more to the story than Liz was letting on. Quietly interrupting Liz’s tirade of sentences, Cooper explained that her wanted her to compile a report and hand it to him before the week was done. Relieved that she now had time to think about certain details that needed to be glossed over, Liz turned to Meera as her friend began enquiring about her physical state.  
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Struggling to maintain focus long enough to form a coherent thought within his mind, Red tried desperately to grab Lizzie’s attention. However, it became clear that she was doing her best to ignore him as she brushed off the blonde agent and walked over to Harold and the CIA agent.

Not being able to gather enough strength to resist, Red simply let Ressler untie his bonds. Red realized that he must look worse than he imagined as he noticed the agent’s surprisingly careful and gentle movements. Once he was free, Red immediately made a valiant attempt to stand; yet Ressler quickly guided him back into the chair. After calling a medic over, Ressler nodded at Red and moved away.

Resigning himself to a few moments of medical attention, Red took to burning holes into Lizzie’s back as he watched her speak to Harold. His fear had caused him to confess something that, before that moment, he had refused to admit even to himself. In a way, he was glad. Now he knew for sure where his feelings lay. There was no more denying, no more questioning. He was in love with her.

As that statement burned like fire in his mind, Red could feel something come over him in waves. Suddenly, he pushed the medic away and stood with an amount of strength that should have been impossible for a man in his condition to possess. His sudden passion and desire for Lizzie pumping through his veins, Red pushed his pain to the side where it belonged. 

Even though he wanted to stride forward confidently, Red found himself limping hurriedly towards the woman he lived for. Normally, Red would have been disgusted with himself for looking so foolish and desperate. But in this moment, he found that he didn’t care in the slightest what he looked like. For once, his emotions were ruling his head, and he ignored the calls coming from the medic behind him.

Red had told Lizzie how he felt, but now that he was certain that he had spoken the truth, he had to prove it. Wasn’t that the old saying? That actions spoke louder than words? Red supposed that there was no time like the present to test that age-old theory.

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ 

Meera wasn’t a fool, and she didn’t believe any of the lies that Liz told her regarding her health. The look in her friend’s eye clearly told Liz that she would be questioning her later about what had really gone down in the room. Liz raised her eyebrows as Meera opened her mouth, obviously intending to question her further. However no words crossed her friend’s lips. Instead, Meera’s gaze shifted from Liz to something behind her.

Curious, Liz turned just as Red reached her. Startled, Liz didn’t have the time to properly react as Red grabbed her arm and began leading her away from her fellow agents. The man’s actions still hadn’t registered Liz’s mind when the pair crossed the threshold of the doorway and entered the corridor. Red turned right and led her for a few more steps.

Confused, Liz almost bumped into Red’s back as he abruptly stopped. Red then turned and faced Liz, removing his grip on her arm. Liz was shocked to observe the swirling vortex of emotions in Red’s eyes. His green orbs held a wild yet determined look, one that she had never seen before. Finally finding her voice, Liz spoke.

“Red, what-“

Liz was cut off as Red suddenly placed his hands on either side of her face and covered her lips with his. At first Liz was shocked, yet she could immediately feel the fireworks going off between them. A spark had been lit, and after a few beats Liz closed her eyes and felt herself succumbing to Red’s passion. 

As the criminal’s mouth moved against hers, Liz knew that she had never been kissed like this before. She had never felt this kind of rush before. Red dominated, but was not over-controlling. They moved in tandem with one another, lips working together like clockwork. Red’s hands slid down to Liz’s waist as she brought her arms up and placed them around Red’s neck. 

Finally recognizing their body’s need to breathe, both parties pulled back. Instead of pulling herself away completely, Liz let her forehead rest against Red’s as they both reveled in their shared passion.

Slowly, Liz opened her eyes. As she stared at the man holding her, it finally clicked in Liz’s brain who she was with. The walls surrounding her heart immediately sprung back up, and Liz moved to create distance between her and Red.

Red, however, seemed to have other ideas. Gently using his hand to pull lightly on Liz’s arm, Red coaxed Liz back towards him. Slowly, Red lowered his head and once again captured Liz’s lips with his own. This second kiss was slow and lingering – very different to the first. But that didn’t mean that it wasn’t filled with any less emotion.

As much as her mind screamed at her that this was wrong, Liz couldn’t find it within herself to care. She felt herself relaxing, finding comfort in the fact that Red wasn’t lying. He wasn’t manipulating her; he didn’t have a bigger agenda. He wanted this, and right now, so did she.

After what seemed like forever, Liz pulled back. Opening her eyes, Liz stared into the green orbs of the man who loved her. A few moments passed, with both Liz and Red being content with simply staying in each other’s arms. However, this finally gave Liz an opportunity to study Red’s face. Most of the blood that had occupied his features had been cleaned; yet his faced was almost completely drained of colour, save for the minute pink tinge of his cheeks.

Before Liz could say or do anything, Red’s eyes had rolled back and he collapsed in her arms. Screaming behind her for help, Liz carefully held onto Red as she lowered both of them to the ground, unable to support him.

As agents came rushing through the door behind her, Liz felt the familiar emotion of worry grip her as she stared down at the man dying in her arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Really hope that wasn't too predictable and cheesy. Apologies if it was. I'm not good at writing kisses and romantic stuff like that, so I hope that it wasn't bad and unbelievable. Anyway, I'm pretty sure the next chapter will be the last one. Thanks so much for reading! Sorry if these chapters seem rushed or completed too quickly. I'm just afraid that if I skip a night, my motivation will wane and I'll be left with another unfinished story. Also, I'm not usually a mulit-fic writer. Thanks for reading - I hope you've enjoyed everything so far :)


	7. Wake Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red has fallen into a coma and Liz sits by his side.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so this isn't the last chapter. Honestly, it was supposed to be, but then I got carried away and decided against adding everything into this chapter. Oh well, I hope an extra chapter doesn't hurt anybody. I'm so sorry that I didn't get this up yesterday, but I was busy doing this journal thing for Drama class (I was supposed to do it continually throughout the year but because I'm a lazy ass I left it to the last minute). I hope this chapter makes up for the wait.
> 
> DISCLAIMER: No, I'm not affiliated with 'The Blacklist' any way, nor do I own any of the characters featured or mentioned in this chapter.

Whispers and brief flashes of light were all Red experienced. He wasn’t sure how long he had been like this; in fact, he didn’t even know what ‘this’ was. Sometimes he felt like a physical being, yet sometimes he simply believed that he was a disembodied conscience, doomed to float around never-space forever. 

Occasionally, when he really strained himself, Red could discern multiple voices reaching out to him through the fog. The most prominent of these voices was a woman’s voice. When she spoke, it was the only time that Red could actually understand coherent sentences. Whenever another voice joined the strange mix, Red could only pick up on syllables and rarely single words.

That was the strangest thing. All of these voices and yet the only one that seemed to reach him properly appeared to be a woman’s soothing tone. Red found himself wondering why this was. Was this woman important to him? Was he important to her? Did he know her before slipping into this realm of darkness and fog? Desperately, Red searched for answers. Yet he could never find one. As soon as he came close to an answer, it slipped away. It was like trying to catch smoke with your bare hands.

No time seemed to pass; yet Red was sure that he had been here for quite a while. Before long, the woman’s voice became the only thing Red cared for. He longed to hear her heavenly tones, and he felt empty when they went away. This woman kept him fighting a battle that he didn’t completely understand. All he knew was that he had to win; he had to fight for this woman. And so he did.  
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Red had been in a coma for two weeks now. Everyday, Liz was by his side, sometimes speaking and sometimes simply sitting. The FBI had allowed her to stay, for which she was immeasurably grateful. Liz knew that Ressler especially was suspicious, however he never raised his doubts. 

The only time Liz ever left the criminal’s side was to use the bathroom. During the first few days, the kind members of the hospital staff had tried to convince her to go home and rest for a bit. They tried to reason that it was bad for her health to be sleeping in a cold, plastic chair every night. However it soon became clear that Liz wasn’t going anywhere. They left her alone after this, yet they still cared for her. One particularly sympathetic nurse brought her a spare pillow to help her sleep.

As the hours rolled by, Liz could feel the despair pooling in her stomach. Everyday, she asked herself the same question: Why wasn’t he awake yet? In truth, Liz wasn’t overly sure that she wanted him to awaken just yet. She knew that everything would be different between them now, and she couldn’t bring herself to think about what she would say to him when he woke. 

Even though Red had made his intentions perfectly clear, she was still extremely confused. Liz knew that he was truly in love with her, and that he would go beyond the edges of the earth to keep her safe. But after all of the heartbreak with Tom, she was finding it difficult to reciprocate Red’s attractions. Most of the time, Liz simply found it easier to push everything to a dark corner in her mind. Then, she would stare out of the window and pray to whoever was out there that Red would wake up. 

Meera was a constant visitor. Liz knew that her friend was awfully worried about her, but she was grateful that Meera seemingly understood Liz’s need to be with Red. Whenever she came, Meera brought her food and sat with her for as long as she could before needing to leave. Liz supposed that this was the best thing about Meera’s visits; she never questioned her or tried to instigate conversation. They simply sat in a comfortable silence, both lost in their own thoughts.

More than once during her silent vigils, Liz could have sworn that she had seen Red’s eyelids twitch. Every time, she quickly became rigid before glancing at the life support systems that were seated on the other side of the criminal’s bed. When she realized that they confirmed that nothing had changed, Liz dismissed her wishful thoughts and put it down to sleep deprivation. 

Even though she knew it was pointless, Liz constantly whispered encouraging statements into Red’s ear. Things such as ‘wake up’, ‘I know you can pull through this; and ‘you’ve still got a job to do, so wake up’. She knew that there was almost no chance of him hearing any of it, but she found it comforting. It helped her deal with the chance that he may never wake up again.

As much as she tried to dismiss it, this thought plagued her mind constantly. What if he never woke up? What if his coma was permanent? What if his heart suddenly stopped? What if his body decided to give up the fight? Hurting more than she would ever admit, Liz leant down during day fifteen of Red’s coma and whispered something that she had so far refused to say.

“Please wake up Red. I need you.”  
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Those few words echoed through the fog and invaded Red’s consciousness like a dagger. It renewed his energy and desire to pull through. He yearned to know the identity of this woman. She needed him, and for reasons unknown, he knew that he had to be there for her. He wanted to be there for her.

As Red strained himself more that he had ever before, the image of a beautiful face flashed through the darkness. The face obviously belonged to woman, and Red was left with no doubt in his mind that this woman was the one who was calling for him. She was the most beautiful thing that Red had even imagined. Her long, brown hair matched perfectly with her deep, chocolate eyes. Red clung desperately to this image, afraid that if he let it slip away he would be left with nothing but the lonesome dark once again.

Filled with a new passion and strengthened desire, Red doubled his efforts to attempting to open his eyes. In truth, Red wasn’t exactly sure whether or not he even had eyes. He supposed that he did, and attempting to open them became his new obsession. 

And so that was all he focused on. Days, months, or perhaps even years could have passed, yet all Red did was concentrate on opening his eyes. He needed to see the beautiful woman that clearly meant a great deal to him. He needed to observe her, and be there for her.  
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Liz was suddenly jerked out of her fitful sleep by a loud beeping sound. Wrenching her eyes open, Liz stared at the heart monitors sitting on the opposite side of Red’s hospital bed. To her amazement, the red line that had been constant for little over two weeks had started jumping up and down more violently. The time between each successive beep decreased, and Liz felt her heart skip in her chest.

Gazing down at the criminal beside her, Liz held her breath. Slowly, Red opened his eyes. Liz felt tears spring to her eyes, yet she refused to let them fall. Carefully, she reached out and gently placed her right hand on the side of his soft, relaxed face. 

Red’s gaze was drawn to her touch, yet slowly he lifted his eyes to stare at her. As their eyes locked, Liz let out the breath she had been holding as Red muttered the only word she needed to hear. It was the word that she had longed for him to say since that fateful day just over two weeks ago. Liz felt the pressure that had been building in her chest being released as Red muttered the two, simple syllables.

“Lizzie.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope that wasn't too confusing. I've never been in a coma (touch wood) so I don't exactly know it's like. I tried my best though - I hope it was alright. Anyway, I'm pretty sure the next chapter is the final one (yeah that's what you said last time and look at you now), so thank you for following this story! I've never completely a multi-chapter fic before and I'm quite looking forward to that accomplished feeling.


	8. Answers and Emotions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red is awake and Liz comes to visit him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Final chapter! Seriously, thank you all so, so much for reading this story. I can't tell you how much that means to me. Without you, this story wouldn't exist. You've given me something to write for. So thank you <3 I really hope you've enjoyed reading this story, and enjoy reading this chapter!
> 
> DISCLAIMER: I am not affiliated with 'The Blacklist' in any way. I don't own any characters in this chapter.

“I know you’re not sleeping.”

Red chuckled, a deep sound that he reserved only for her. He opened his eyes to the image of perfection. Lizzie, standing by his bedside with the light from the window bathing her in a warm glow. Red wasn’t sure if he’d ever seen anything more beautiful. 

“You know me too well, dear.”

It had been three days since Red has awoken to find Lizzie beside him. During that time, she had finally left him in order to go home and properly shower and sleep. The nurses had informed him that whilst he was unconscious, she had only left his beside to use the restroom. Red was touched; mainly because he couldn’t remember a time when someone had willingly given up so much for him. But then again, he had never met a person like his Lizzie before. 

“How’re you feeling?”

“Better now that you’re here.”

Lizzie half-smiled; he could tell that she still hadn’t accepted what he had confessed in that warehouse. Red couldn’t blame her though. He was a notorious criminal and a liar; she had no reason to trust anything that passed through his lips. Yet despite what he might have said before, Red would lead her to the truth and he would do everything in his power to help her believe it.

Lizzie sat down in her usual spot beside him. Now that she was closer, Red could discern the slight nervousness that clouded her beautiful eyes. Confused, Red patiently waited for Lizzie to break the silence.

“I need you to be honest with me.”

“Even if I am, you wouldn’t believe me.”

“I would.”

Red felt his next sentence dying in his throat as he processed Lizzie’s words. She…trusted him? Lizzie, obviously sensing Red’s confusion, continued.

“You’re the only one who has never lied to me. Now-“

Lizzie hesitated, and Red could practically hear the debate raging inside of her head. After a few moments of internal debate, Lizzie finally continued, speaking much softer than before. 

“Were you the one spying on me?”

Red, slightly surprised, fixed Lizzie with his most honest and open stare. He relaxed his body, and gave every physical sign that he was telling the truth. Despite knowing that Lizzie was having trouble trusting her profiling skills lately, he wagered that it couldn’t hurt to appeal to them.

“No.”

Lizzie visually relaxed. Red was shocked that she would believe him so readily. Of course, he wasn’t lying, but she hadn’t believed his word much lately. 

“You believe me now?”

“Like I said, you’ve never lied to me. Plus, the Bureau can’t compile enough evidence to make a case against you. I just needed to hear it from you, that’s all.”

Elated, yet feeling the need to elaborate and completely clear his name, Red continued.

“The man who abducted me, ‘John Harrison’, he was the man that sanctioned the surveillance on you. He was mainly watching Thomas, yet I believe he quickly became just as focused on you.”

“Because of my job?”

“Because of me.”

Lizzie’s eyes widened. “But nobody knew that we were working together.”

“I believe they knew more than is comfortable. As I was saying, they saw you as a way to me. That’s why they took you, that’s why they hurt you.” Red could feel his eyes filling with sadness and regret. “I’m sorry, Lizzie.”

“Don’t be. It’s fine.”

“No, it’s not fine.” Red could feel his emotions piling up, getting ready for ignition. “I put you in harms way, I could have gotten you killed.”

“It’s not as if you haven’t done that before.” Lizzie joked, clearly afraid of the serious turn their conversation was taking. Red sat up, and leaned against the white hospital pillows. 

“This time was different Lizzie, you know that. I…wasn’t in control. And if you had died, I wouldn’t-“

Red quickly caught himself before he said something that he would regret. He was acting and speaking on emotion, something that he had not done in twenty years. Even though Lizzie already knew that he loved her, and that he would do anything for her, he still didn’t like the idea of revealing too much. Not yet, anyway.

Lizzie’s eyes had unfocused, as if she was lamenting over the words that had been left unsaid. Quickly wanting to steer the conversation into safer waters, Red spoke.

“Where are Dembe and Luli? Are they alright?”

“They’re fine.” Lizzie seemed relived for the change of topic as well. “Some other agents found them in a separate room. Dembe was pretty beat up, but they’ve both made a full recovery.”

Red felt relief wash over him. As much as he would quickly deny any feelings for them, Dembe and Luli were the closest things to friends that he had. If anything had happened to them, he wouldn’t have hesitated to hunt down every last member of ‘John Harrison’s’ men and execute them himself.

A comfortable silence fell over the pair, both lost in their own thoughts. Before long, however, Red felt the need to question Lizzie once again.

“You’ve never mentioned anything about Tom.”

“We’re done.” Lizzie replied quickly. “The divorce papers went through last week. It’s over.”

“Good.”

“Good?” Lizzie raised her eyebrow.

“For you, I mean.” Red hastily recovered. “You wouldn’t want to tie yourself to a criminal, now would you?”

Lizzie tensed; they had finally arrived at the touchy subject. As much as Red would have preferred to beat around the bush, the truth was out and was most certainly not going back in. Not that Red wanted it to however; there was no denying that Lizzie had willingly kissed him back. 

“Red, I can’t-“

“You can’t think about it because it would interfere with your job.”

“I can’t because I still don’t know where I stand with you. I’m so confused, Red.” 

The pain in Lizzie’s voice jabbed at Red’s heart and hurt him in ways that he couldn’t fathom. 

“When you’ve worked everything out, I’ll be here, Lizzie.”

He might be a criminal, but Red was enough of a gentleman to recognize Lizzie’s inner turmoil. He would never force her into something that she wasn’t ready for. When she came to him, he wanted it to be of her own free will. He wanted her to consciously choose him. He knew that it wasn’t likely to happen soon, yet he was a patient man, and he knew by now that he would wait for Lizzie until time ran out.

Pushing aside his deep yearning to kiss her again, Red simply reached out and took her right hand in his left. He felt delighted when she didn’t pull away. Instead she squeezed his hand, showing her thanks to him for understanding, and not pressuring her into anything.

As he lay there, the Concierge of Crime truly felt happy. With his Lizzie by his side, nothing could hurt him. Nothing could take away the absolute content he felt in this moment. 

It was then that he realized what he should have seen all along. Throughout his journeys, throughout his deals and lies, all he really needed was someone there for him. Someone that he could turn to, someone that he could rely on. Someone that he could make jokes with, and talk to for hours on end. Someone whose hand would be willing to hold his in return. And he was glad, that that someone was Elizabeth Keen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THE END. or is it? I did say this was the last chapter, but I never said anything about an epilogue... Would you guys even want an epilogue? Or are you happy for it to end here? I don't really mind either way. Once again, thank you so so so so so so so much for reading this/commenting/kudos-ing. I appreciate every single one of you - you guys make my day :)


	9. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it! I could give you the excuses as to why this wasn't up sooner, but instead I'm simply gonna give it to you.
> 
> DISCLAIMER: I'm not affiliated with 'The Blacklist' in any matter (solid, liquid, gas, take your pick), nor do I own any characters present in this chapter.

Two years had passed since the whole warehouse fiasco. During that time, Red had made a full recovery, and they had resumed their business of capturing the criminals on the Blacklist. It had taken a long, long time, but eventually it had come down to the final name on the list. The most dangerous criminal the world never knew. 

Two months ago, they had finally gotten a lead on #1. It had led them on a cat and mouse chase that sent them running through the world, dealing with dangerous men and women and almost getting killed on numerous occasions. However, not five minutes ago, the FBI, with Red’s help of course, had tracked down #1 and had apprehended him. It was a dirty fight, and both sides sustained losses. Despite none of the odds being in their favour, the FBI had come out victorious.

Now, as Liz stood watching Ressler and the other agents escort a bloodied and defeated #1 away, she was reminded of the suggestion that Red had made when they had first gotten wind of #1. 

They had been sitting in his apartment, surrounded by theories and profiles, when Red had spoken. He confessed that when all of this was over, he wished to retire. To hide in some random corner of the earth and live out his days in peace. Liz was surprised to find that she secretly agreed. Of course, Red had asked if she wished to accompany him, yet she could not give him an answer. She was afraid, but she also knew that she had duty. Red had quickly dismissed that notion, saying that she had already given the FBI plenty. After all, she had signed on to be a profiler, yet had taken on the role of a field agent instead.

Still, Liz hadn’t answered him. She couldn’t afford to be side-tracked, not when their mission was reaching its climax. She had never forgotten it though, and more than once she had found herself lying awake for hours on end, contemplating a peaceful life with Red. She was shocked when her brain wasn’t at all appalled by the idea. In fact, she found the possibility as one to be seriously considered.

As she stood outside #1’s safe house, her eyes searched for him. He was standing a few feet away, staring off into the distance, his mind obviously else ware. Whilst others might’ve looked at him and seen his usual poker face, Liz could see the accomplishment, the relief pooling in his eyes. His enemies were vanquished and his quest complete.

When Red finally seemed to tune back into his surroundings, his eyes locked with hers. At that second, the rest of the world seemed to melt away. Like no person or thing existed apart from them. Almost in a trace-like state, Liz felt her feet move of their own accord, taking her closer to him. His peaceful green eyes never left her determined brown ones. 

Every member of the FBI and #1’s people turned to stare as the FBI profiler embraced the Concierge of Crime. The world seemed to forget about the noise it was supposed to make as her lips met his. A stunned silence fell over those present, yet none of this mattered to Liz.

The only thing that she cared about, the only thing that mattered in this moment was the way his lips moved against hers. The way he held his arms around her protectively, the way she clung to him as if the world would end if she let go. 

In perfect synchronization, they pulled back, breathless and excited. A new light had been ignited in Liz’s eyes; a fire that yearned for him, and him alone. From the knowing smirk on his perfect lips, Liz knew that he could see right through her and her wishes. Gently taking her hand in his, Red led her away from the pain, from her job, from everything.

As they disappeared into the darkness, no one attempted to stop them. Everyone simply stared after them, wondering what in hell had just happened. 

They never saw the profiler or the criminal again.

For Red took Liz away, and together they boarded his private jet and departed, destined for a new life. Red happened to own a small farmhouse in Australia. It wasn’t a mansion, nor was it a one-room shack. It wasn’t situated in the outback, however it was far enough from civilization that no one would ever bother them. 

As Liz lay down in her new bed, she felt the heat from Red’s body against her back as he held her. Right here, right now, she felt happy. With Red, she would never be lonely again. Red’s hand slowly reached out and grabbed her own. 

With a sigh of content, Liz felt safe. She thought back to that day two years ago, where Red had confessed his love for her. In the years that followed, he had never once wavered in his dedication to her. And as they grew closer and closer, Liz had felt her heart slowly opening and becoming a tool to love again. 

Right now, held in the arms of an ex-criminal, Liz knew that finally, she loved him too. Carefully, Liz twisted so that she faced him. There would be no more denials, no more dodging. In her heart, she had accepted her feelings, and she knew that she would be a fool if she did not tell him. After everything that he had done for her, he deserved to know. 

“You once told me that you loved me.”

“I do.”

“I love you too.”

Red smirked in the way he knew she loved. “I know, Lizzie.”

Their lips met, and once again the fireworks erupted between them. Smiling against him, Liz could feel heat rising in her stomach and settling in her chest. The two loners had found peace in each other. They both now had what they had been searching for all their lives. A heart to love, and a hand to hold.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THE END. And I mean it this time. I sincerely hope you enjoyed not only this epilogue, but this entire story as well. I tried my best, and it's the first multi-chapter fic I've ever written. Thank you to everyone who had read/commented/kudos-ed. I love you all so much, thank you for all of your support and encouragement.


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